Posted by: katedaphne | January 29, 2008

Minding my p’s and q’s

So I promised y’all a little chitchat here about donor eggs. I’ll get to that, but first I want to bring up a few words about privacy in the blogosphere.

Other people have written before on this subject, and more, and better. In fact, I read a great post about it last week and if I can find it again I’ll link to it here. I was surfing at work and don’t remember where I was. (Think you know? Jog my memory in a comment, I’ll send a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day.)

With a few exceptions, most of us bloggers are anonymous, at least on some level. There’re great reasons for keeping the blog anonymous. For many, it is the only way to be totally open. If we knew our friends or family were reading, we might censor ourselves, either consciously or unconsciously.

My blog is different because it is directly attributable to my real, true identity. That’s because while of full and sound mind, completely unintoxicated, I made two decisions: One, to publish my story in the newspaper last fall, and Two, to start this blog and link the story to it. I figured what the heck, it’s all out there anyway, why start hiding now?

Most of my Gentle Readers are unknown to me IRL (though I would love to meet many of them!). My family knows I blog, I think, but they aren’t readers. I’d let them but they get enough from me in person so aren’t real interested. And a few readers are IRL friends, mostly those I don’t see real often, and so they check on me here. And I love them for it.

But now I have a dilemma — I want to talk about something sorta private, but I don’t want to censor myself, and I don’t want to go password protected. So I’m going to do something else: Trust. That what happens in SoE stays in SoE. And I KNOW it goes without saying, and if it were just me, I wouldn’t even bother to say. But, please universe, it will also affect another human being someday, so I’d like to leave the conversing about some things up to him/her, if and when he/she exists and is old enough to give a crap.

Why trust? Well, why not? I am not now nor have I ever been the kind of person who goes through life suspicious of everyone and expecting the worst. And yes, a few times I’ve gotten burned. But much more often than not, I’ve had good experiences, made friends, etc. I can’t judge people who don’t trust; I expect they have their reasons, and anyway, it takes all kinds. But I am the kind who trusts. My dad taught me to “Trust, but verify,” so I guess that’s what this little disclaimer today is.

Tomorrow, we’ll talk about donor eggs and my sister.



  1. Brave Girl!!

    I’m trusting, too. However, I have had my a$$ bit hard by another blog I had that was “discovered.” I went underground with this blog because I wanted the freedom to write about the things deepest and darkest about me. I suppose the difference was that then I was writing about other people. That may have made all the difference.

  2. My blog identity is pretty known too. I use my real name and my IRL friends know about it – although only a few read it. I have censored myself a couple of times when I felt it might unduly hurt someone’s feelings, but mostly I put it all out there.

    Why not? It is how I feel. I am looking forward to your next post.

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