Posted by: katedaphne | November 11, 2007

dh is not a sperm donor

One of the best things I have going for me in this hell that is IF (I can’t stand the word “journey” — anyone have a better word for this?) — is my relationship with my husband. We were always tight, much tighter than any couple we know, it seems. And somehow we have not only stayed that way but gotten even closer. Infertility puts so much stress in so many forms on each partner, it is no wonder that some very good marriages fall part because of it. But we are so lucky to have each other.

 We’re on the same page about so many things, not least about our desire to have children. I often feel bad for women who are the ones longing for a baby and their husbands are just along for the ride. I mean, it’s nice that they are along, but if they aren’t invested then they just can’t provide the level of support that a person needs while undergoing IVF or other fertility treatments.

But us — well, he wants a child as much as I do. Maybe more, if that is possible. Every roadblock, every heartache, isn’t just mine, it is his too.  It is wonderful to not be going through this alone. Although — it makes the hard times that much worse because I see his sorrow and wish I cold make it go away, and I just can’t. I hate to see him hurting. But we always have each other to seek comfort in.

I mention my husband because I asked him for advice on what the tagline of this blog should be. “A few words explainging what your blog is about.” He advised being sure the word “repeated” was in there, because we are not in the same place as an IVF newbie.

“You’re not in the same place as those who say” (his voice gets very high and squeaky here) “Hi everybody. Wish me luck on my first IVF!!!!!!!” (grins wildly, giddily tips head from side to side).

 “I mean, you’re a f—— VETERAN!” he cackled.

I love this guy!!!


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